Frankenhooker (1990)

Frankenhooker seems like it should be the title for a parody porno, unfortunately it’s not. This is a real movie that exists. There are a lot of 90’s boobs though which is neat. I was kept up way past my bed time to watch this movie about a guys ugly wife who is murdered by a berserk lawnmower. He keeps her body parts in a special purple goo fridge and then picks all the best parts from all the best hookers. Unfortunately though all the best hookers explode from taking super crack. The guy with the dead wife with takes all the exploded hooker parts and puts his dead wifes head on them and brings her back to life. I.E. Frankenhooker. There’s a pimp named Zorro who’s really buff too, he says some funny things sometimes. Somehow the stupid guy with the dead wife ends up with his stupid head on a body made up of the all crappy unused hooker parts. The end.

[speaking to a room full of scattered body parts after all the hookers explode]
“I want to apologize to everybody here.”


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