this movie sucks.
( NO / 5)
jeffrey combs, andrew divoff, and most of the make up were the only good things about this movie. the cgi, shitty one liners, extremely slow pace, and everything else sucks.
the opening scene of this movie is so magical until some asshole fishermen fuck it all up by capturing a female orca that was with her mate. they string the bitch up and it turns out that she was preggers as a whale fetus falls out of her whale vagina and onto the poop deck.
male orca is pissed and tells his other orca friends after a weird ass whale beaching funeral he returns to the ocean to reek havoc on the town and get his revenge.
also features shitty music, a pissy scientist lady, explosions, bad accents, air sharks, sweet black knit caps, people who think they are in the movie jaws but are not, and a really smart and really pissed off whale.
mouth rot took a field trip yesterday to the nightmare gallery in Salem Mass.
although there were no pictures allowed inside the monster museum, its def worth the 8 bucks to get in.
with scenes and life size replicas from multiple different awesome horror movies there’s something there for everyone.
GO ! and if you’re caught taking pictures you’ll get thrown out. so don’t be an asshole
a bunch of dudes on
awesome bikes with awesome beards drive around causing trouble and looking for satan all while an awesome sound track is playing.
some evil monks turn a biker lady into a werewolf and she kills some people.
theres also plenty of boobs and 70s bush. A werewolf on wheels for about 30 seconds (which is kind of a let down), naked dancing, snakes, homo erotic madness, taking bread from strangers, tarot card readings, and naps.
(3 out of 5)
A group of people are kidnapped and locked in a dirty apartment and told to torture each other by the ugliest woman ever to collect adrenaline I really don’t know what I’m talking about but if adrenaline harvesting was a thing I bet there would be way easier methods to getting the juices flowing than ripping your fingernails out also there’s some weak attempt at developing some nonsense story line just ignore it
A catholic girls schools is hiding a book of spells and a bunch of sluts these little witches (they are all in there late 20’s) dance naked around a bowl for most of the movie one of the girls has second thoughts about it feeds the other girls vanilla wafers to get it to stop the satan shows up as a three headed alligator and eats a bitch
(1.6 out of 5)